Thursday, January 17, 2013


The two girls sat close, touching hands in a gesture of both familiarity and affection. They were similar in age but not in attire. One was all blonde ponytail and Juicy track suit, the other, her mother's clothes. I would have guessed them to be around seventy years.

They were talking, as girlfriends do, about boys.

Miss Ponytail: “I need a break from Lenny.”

Miss Drab: “You should meet Don.” “He's nothing like Lenny, you'd like him.”

Miss P: “Is he fat? I don't like fat.”

Miss D: “He's not fat.”

Miss P: “Does he have hair? I like hair.” Her voice trailed off, lost in the image of her ideal man.
“You know, she continues, switching back to Lenny, “it's not that he's not a good man. “He calls me twice a day.

Miss D: “Twice a day?”

Miss P: “Twice a day. But what I don't like is his obsession with money. It has to be the best restaurant, the most expensive coat. You know, it's just too much pressure.”

Miss D: “Pressure?”

Miss P: “All I'm looking for is a nice, normal Jewish man. Is that too hard to find?”

Miss D: “It's not too hard to find, but I think you're being fussy.”

Miss P: “Fussy?”

Miss D: “You can't afford to be fussy at your age.”

Miss P: “What do you mean, 'my age'?”

Miss D: “Oy vey, you're no spring chicken. How often does a man come along with his own teeth and hair?”

Miss P: “Lenny doesn't have his own teeth.”

Miss D: “But Lenny can look down and check that his shoes match his belt. That's no mean feat in this day and age.”

Miss P: “His shoes have to be the most expensive shoes.”

Miss D: “I don't think your trouble is men.”

Miss P: “What do you mean?”

Miss D: “So take Lenny. There's nothing wrong with Lenny. Plenty of girls would like Lenny.”

Miss P: “What are you saying?”

Miss D: “But it's all 'Lenny's got problems'. 'He's too obsessive about money...'”

Miss P: “'You don't understand.”

Miss D: “What do you mean, 'I don't understand?”

Miss P: “You're not with Lenny.”

Miss D: “Who said I want to be with Lenny?”

Miss P: “If you were with Lenny, you would know what I mean.”

The train pulled up to their station and they both got up to leave.

Miss D: “And if it doesn't work out with Lenny, come meet Don.”

Miss P “I'm not interested in Don.”

Miss D: “How do you know?”

Miss P: “You said he was nothing like Lenny.”

© 2013 Jackie Maw Tolliver 

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